


The Arcana Fanfiction Afterstory Julian x Reader

by divadonadance



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Dorks in Love, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Kissing, Love, Other, Romance, Romantic Fluff, Romantic Gestures
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:34:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23416045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/divadonadance/pseuds/divadonadance
Summary: The arcana is a visual novel app game, which branches in different routes as you pick your love interest. This is a fanfiction about the events after the main story, where your lover is Julian Devorak. The apprentice/Reader after defeating the Devil, they come back from the Arcana realms with all their friends. While being alone at the palace's garden, you keep thinking about your best friend Asra, especially about the fact that he revived you but didn't tell you why he went so far for you. You are unsure if you are ready to face what he has to say or if he will not try to dodge this like most of the time you asked him about your past. This dilemma eats you on the inside, but don't worry, Julian comes to the rescue with his dramatic acts. Also, he will listen and be by your side until all those doubts will scatter away. In the end, you will come with a definitive decision.
Relationships: Apprentice/Julian Devorak, Julian Devorak & You, Julian Devorak/Reader
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	The Arcana Fanfiction Afterstory Julian x Reader

**Author's Note:**

> I suggest that if you want to enjoy this piece I wrote, you should play this game first and have some idea about the characters beforehand. Because of my love for this game and creating stories in my mind, I decided to write this fanfic. Actually it might take quite a while to post all the chapters I have in plan, if I keep going with the idea that I want to finish this story in the future. Either way, I want to practice my writing skills, since I haven't written in years, but still kept daydreaming throughout these years and this is the best way to do that, by writing about something I love. So constructive criticisms, advices and comments are really appreciated. Have a lovely day, random reader!!

I went out to the palace's garden. Reality seems **_stranger_** after coming back from the Arcana realm. I observe the willow trees and look **up** at the night sky; how **many days** have passed. The Masquerade is **over** now and it appears the events here were **more** chaotic, while I and Julian were away. After we came back, I heard that some attendants weren't certain if the **odd** parts they experienced were _real._ And some remembered **nothing**. I noticed **how** **_exhausted_** I was and then I spot on my left side a stone bench **under** a willow tree. Sat downed and **took** a few **deep** breaths that I had held **back** during the predicaments and troubles I had faced.

I tried to digest everything that **transpired** these days... my death, the plague, the Arcana, Julian… My mind kept going to **one unanswered** question, why did Asra go **so** far to revive me?

 ** _At first_** , when I asked Asra, he **didn't** remember all that happened during the ritual. The **original** purpose of the rite was for ex-Count Lucio to obtain his new body. **But** thanks to Asra, that body revived me instead. What **if** he has reclaimed some of his memories **now** , like how Julian or Nadia did? Asra has **always** been there for me. He **took** care of me when I couldn't; he taught me **everything** again when I was like a little child. It is **so** unfair to not thank him, as he deserves for what he has done for me. It is the _least_ I can do, **_right_**?

There are some **unspoken** regrets between Asra and my former self. I can tell from the way he gazes at me and when the past is mentioned he looks so hurt.

My wish to have my memories reclaimed has **never** faded. It keeps growing **more** and **_more_** each day, also the fear of what I may find out **grows** with it. There is even the **stake** of falling in a catatonic state again. Moreover, I can **lose** all of my memories, which right now they have become **_precious_** to lose.

"Can I have the **pleasure** to sit beside such a _ravishing_ being?" 

At once I **recognized** the voice behind me and his _cheeky_ tone. So I turned around. And I saw his **tall** figure, his _curly_ **_messy_** auburn hair, his grey eyes gazing me while **flashing** a _lopsided_ grin. He **lost** his eye patch earlier, so the **red** sclera of his right eye is visible in tonight's moonlight. He is **still** wearing his **black** costume with feathers. It is much more **_disheveled_** now than it was when we **bought** our costumes together at the start of the Masquerade. His _silky_ **red** tie was loose around his neck. Nevertheless, his presence **_calms_** me from my _puzzling_ thoughts. My desire to **cling** onto the past that I can't even remember _fades_ away and I get **absorbed** by the present.

"You **took** your time, Julian." I give him a _subtle_ wink and **pat** the stone bench for him to sit. He sat down and **wraps** my shoulders with his right arm.

"I know, I **_know_** … **but** Peyton, Tilde and her wife caught up to me to check how I was. Peyton, **that rascal**! He told them we were following a goat ghost, and they became worried because we disappeared for a while. We left for **like two days**! Besides, they were kind of confused about _what happened_ during the last day of the Masquerade."

"Tilde mentioned that she had **_some hazy memories_** , in which she was dancing and couldn't stop **at all**?!" Julian pinches the _bridge_ of his nose "It sounds _bizarre_ if you ask me."

"From what Asra told me after we came back from the Arcana realm, it was **Devil's doing**. The Devil was trying to interfere with our plans by making Asra's task **_more difficult_** to get done." I drew a **deep** sigh and turn to face Julian with a caring smile.

"We don't **need** to worry about that anymore, we **defeated** him… he's _gone._ " I leaned closer and **nuzzled** my head in his neck's alcove. His smell was all my nostrils **could** inhale. My stomach **_fluttered_** , but my mind was _serene_. Like when I'm at home, in my shop, _delighted_ and **_safe._**

Julian chuckles, "We _really_ did it… **together** haha!" he quiets down and for a brief time, we remain _calm_.

"How are you Y/N? You used up **a lot** of stamina to obliterate that baboon-faced waste of skin. You kicked that warthog-faced buffoon's **ass**!" I laugh from his ludicrous remarks. He grasps my chin, and I raise my head from his neck's nook. All my facial features are being observed by his drifting eyes.

"Hmm… you look a little _gray_ and you _definitely_ require some sleep. Also, a cup of tea would be **nice**. With **cookies**! And then you should take a _warm_ bath and if you want I can..." more Julian suggests ways for me to relax, the **more** he beams. When Julian acts like this, he **won't** quit worrying about anything that can bother me. But he is **so** adorable when he cares for me, even **if** he goes overboard with it **_sometimes_**.

I **can't** help myself. I **stroke** his cheek with my hand; my thumb rubs to appease his nerves. He **stops** his ramble, his brows furrow in _confusion_. I **close** the space between us and **kiss** him.

Julian got **stunned** at first, but then he responds my touch with a tender **caress** while his arms **wrap** around my waist. My hands clutch the fabric **on** his chest; the feathers are _tickling_ my fingers. I sense his _quiet_ heartbeat through his **black** cloth; it made my heart **pound,** and the heat **_rises_** in my cheeks. Julian tilts his head, **deepening** the kiss. My body _trembles_ and I release a _soft_ moan from the **back** of my throat. His curls _tickled_ my warm cheeks, and this **excites** the butterflies in my stomach. My fingers _slide_ at the nape of his neck, and I **stroked** his _silky_ auburn mane. My grip **tightens** in his _smooth_ hair; Julian emits a **guttural** growl that made my chest light up and my heart skip a beat. One of my arms _crawls_ around his shoulders and I **dig** my nails in his **dark** jacket from the **rush** of excitement. I **ended** his babbling, but now I'm **craving** for his _gentle_ touch, **_lingering_ deep** kisses and those **muffled** sounds that he releases the **more** I touch him. The surge of sensations lets me appreciate **how** significant **his _existence_** is for me and **mine** for him. When we **part** away, his low **_rumbling_** laughter vibrates in my chest.

"I **_love_** it when you make **the first move** Y/N!" Julian bends his head aside and I recognize his flushed look with that **broad** grin. I'm so contented to witness his _delight_ and his **amazed,** wandering stare.

"It makes me feel **so** _adored_ and happy." Julian chuckles, I haven't seen him often smile like **that** these restless days. Now that those times have passed, I wonder **if** I am going to able to make him **beam** like this whenever I can.

" _Well_ , I wanted to **cease** your worrying about me since you are **such** a **_worrywart_**. I guess bad habits die **hard** , _huh_?" my arms shift from his shoulders and I **grasp** his cool palms. In return, Julian **rubs** his thumbs on my hands.

"Besides when you are **so** caring, my heart **can't** handle it and…"

A slow swallow passes and I **look** anywhere **but** his grey eyes, my cheeks glow **more**. "And you are **_adorable_** so…" I whisper and that **sets** my heart ablaze.

"Oh! Y/N, you are quite **bold** today. It is a _captivating_ sight haha!" Julian bites his bottom lip, but he can't stop his grin. Julian leans and gives me a peck on my forehead, smiling in between. "You are always **full** of surprises. Sometimes, you are **_so_** shy, hehe! And other times, like when we were dancing, you **dipped me** with _such_ confidence. I love how **_unpredictable_** you are, darling!" Julian laughs with such appreciation for me.

" _All right_ , **enough** with the teasing, I _know_ I'm adorable too. Ugh, this is exhausting me **much** more than fighting a devil." I sneak a peek to see Julian's expression. He **grasps** my shoulders and stares at me wide-eyed.

"My dear **Y/N**! How **_could_** you say that? To a big _fuzzy_ worrywart like me? You _know_ what reaction you will get from me!" Julian shakes my shoulders vigorously. Of course, he goes back into his theatrical acts, but the corners of his lips are quivering. He is trying so **_hard_** to keep a straight face.

I will play along and seek my chance to crush his act _apart_.

"Julian, I will be blunt **with** you. You are not **that** hairy. I have seen **plenty of** _fuzzier_ men than you." I shake my head discontented and Julian lets out a dramatic gasp. He gets a mischievous glint in his eyes "Y/N, y-you have been seeing **_other_** fellows besides **me**?"

I snickered, immediately I put my palm **over** my mouth. I had to catch him off guard and here I am, almost bursting **out loud** laughing. **Need** to maintain my poker face, no matter **what**.

"My love, _why_? **Ack**! M-My heart is breaking in _pieces_! Shattering **all** o-over the place!" Julian puts the back of his hand over his forehead, pretending to faint. "I-It was that b-baker, wasn't it? Y-You went with him **just** because you _love_ his pumpkin bread **so** **much, huh**?" Julian rolls his eyes and his fist clutch his chest.

"I _know_ he also has some _bulky_ and _sturdy_ arms from kneading all sorts of bread dough **every single day**! **But** -" then Julian starts to unbutton his coat, he fumbles with some buttons. It seems his act is reaching the finality. Better prepare myself to seem as expressionless as I can. I take a deep breath… **this** won't be _easy_.

Julian lets his _loose_ jacket **slide** from his arms. He unbuttons _a few_ **more** buttons of the white shirt he **had** worn underneath. **Stops** **_when_** half of his shirt was loose. Then his hands **clutched** both sides of his collar and expose his _pale_ chest in front of me.

" **Look at me**! _Touch_ me! You c-can't say I'm not _fuzzy_! If this doesn't s-satisfy you, I-I will grow them **even** _more_ **.** It doesn't matter what it will _c-cost_ me to reach that. **Hell** , I will even research magic and y-you _know_ how much that would **crush** my pride as a man of science! But for you, **_love_** , I would sacrifice **anything** … so _please_ don't give up on this _poor_ desperate **man**." Julian stares at me with determination. He is _so_ close to breaking his act. I'm amazed that he didn't burst out laughing by now.

This is now my chance to shatter his performance, let's **break** his facade!

I take an **_inaudible_** sigh while looking at his bare chest. I **give** him a _sly_ look, and my palm lies **on his chest**. He shudders under my **warm** contact, yet keeps his **persistent** stare towards my view. He is expecting what I have to _convey_. Under my touch, his heartbeat _quickens_. His throat **bobs** as he swallows.

"Ah Julian, _Julian_ … you **miserable** man."

I **reach** with my other hand the strand of his auburn hair and tuck it behind **his ear**. **Now** I can appreciate both of his eyes observing and following **_each_** of my movements.

"As an experienced magician, I can say you are a _hopeless_ case, _especially_ in your **hairy** situation. **But** don't worry, **_love_**. This heart beats for you and only you, **_darling_**! We have to accept reality; there are **hairier** men than you. Although **_sweetie_** , you need to know that no one makes me laugh and happy as you do. I want to create more memories from now on with you, my **_ever new delight_**!" I kiss his nose as my ultimate move and witness my goal come to fruition.

"I, uh, _er_ , l-l-lo-, **_what_** , well, I..." Julian runs his palm across his mouth, but my eyes **catch** his blushed face. A sheepish smile spreads on his face, his sight averts me.

I let my roar **out** , Julian jumps from my sudden reaction.

" **Oh** , Julian! You can throw them but you **can't** take them haha!" I chuckle; Julian is gazing at me, still with a flushed expression. "Of course that worked with you, with _naughty_ Julian haha!" "Mission accomplished!" I **raise** one of my arms up in the air victoriously, like a gladiator who **succeeds** in another battle in the Coliseum.

Julian regains his composure and coughs before he speaks, "I won't deny Y/N that took me off guard. I mean it was a little **_extreme_** _,_ y-you said like **five** pet names and until this day-"

"Four."

"Huh?"

"I said _four_ nicknames. Do you want me to repeat them for you, **_love_**?" I stare at him with a _cheeky_ grin, his eyes narrow and a **forced** smile creeps.

"No. Thank you for your consideration, **my love**!"

"Anything for you, _my ever new delight_!"

With a **_suppressed_** groan, he moves his hand across his face and **shut** his eyes. I can't quit giggling. This is fun to see, but I don't want to cross my line **too** much.

"Wahaha! _Alright,_ Julian, I won't **call** you any of those nicknames anymore, haha! I got what I wanted from it, but I couldn't help myself to stop **_teasing_** you even further. I'm sorry-"

" _No_ , you are _not_ ~." Julian looks at me with his good eye, and a wry smirk spreads on his face.

" _Well_ ~… I guess I'm **_not_** haha! I like to witness many expressions from you because I love your surprises as well, **_darling_**!"

His _piercing_ glare spiked my guilty soul. I was **_about_** to apologize again, _seriously_ this time. But then he **cracks** in a peal of **loud** laughter with arms wrapped around his stomach. I join his _ecstatic_ mood, and all we hear for a while is **our** mirth. We tried to regain our composure, but we kept chuckling besides our **_futile_** attempts.

"Hahaha! Hehe come **_here_** ~" I found myself covered in Julian's long arms. His unique smell is **all** I can inhale; strange enough that makes my breaths _steadier_. I can feel Julian's chin resting on my shoulders, heaving a deep sigh behind my neck. His cool hand **stroked** my hair, driving my eyes to close; I can sense his touch **even** more.

"I **_love_** hearing the **sound** of your laugh." Julian said with soft whispers. I chuckle and tighten my embrace **on** him. "And I **love** making you laugh haha!" Our giggles vibrate through our bodies, making us **more aware** of our intimacy. We break our cuddle but still, **hold** each other hands.

While we create some distance between us, I recognize Julian's murderer brand tattoo **on** his left hand. It had an upside-down, double-cross with a heart and a simple design with only **black** ink. What does **that** symbol mean? Maybe it means betrayal since Julian **used** to work under ex-Count Lucio, later on, he **got** accused of Lucio's murder.

The tattoo, it reminds me of **everything** we experienced these days. Julian returns to Vesuvia, my duty from the Countess to **capture** him and let him get judged in **front** of justice. I noticed things weren't as they seemed, especially Julian and I **fell in love** with him. I had to prove his innocence when we **found out** he didn't kill Lucio. Our **_corrupt_** system of court and Julian's _hidden_ **plan** caused him to get a guilty verdict. His punishment was **hanging** , and it took place in public. The image of Julian getting **hanged** and together with it the people's **cries** , _cheers_ , **_heckles_** …

It sends **_chills_** down my spine **every single time**. Either way, other things happened as the **so high** mentioned, the Masquerade. _In the end_ , everything led to where we are **now**.

The symbol **also** made me think about Julian before Lucio's death, the **one** I have met and known, but **can't** recall. Before how **close** we were? Did I **_love_** him back then? Like how I do **now**? I learned that I **worked** as an apprentice for him, but _why_ did I study medicine? It was because of the **plague**?

It upsets me that in the past Julian **faced** so much injustice. **But** even then he **could** rely on other people; they helped him **escape** from Vesuvia. Besides that, he used to believe that _every_ problem he encountered, he must solve them **on his own. S** o no one else would be put in danger for **_his sake_**. Julian went through **a lot** , but from all of it he **still** grew and that makes me **so** happy and **_proud of him_**.

I lift his left hand and give it a _tender_ peck. As I **raise** my eyes, Julian's bewildered look with his tilted head is **all** my sight caught.

" _Umm_ Y/N? Why did you **do that**?" He gawks at me like I did **the most** enigmatic thing in the world.

"I wanted to show you **_some_** love." As my grasp from his palm _releases_ , I **show** him a warm smile.

" _I see_ … I guess I'm **_still_** not used to your unexpected shows of affection. I **promise** I will get more comfortable with that, alike with the **_pet names_** haha!" Julian lets a short giggle. I decide to **not** tease him anymore. I appreciate his ambition to keep improving and his interest in what the future can offer **us**.

"Anyway… Now _since_ we are **both** at ease, I have to ask you something, **_my dear_**." His gaze is intense, I leaned closer and **nod** for him to continue.

"All right, Y/N. What is happening **_between_** you and Asra?"… Wait **what**? How did he realize **what** has been bothering me? Have I been **that obvious**? I suppose I'm **not** as _mysterious_ as people tend to call me.

" _Well_ … it looks like something is going on **more** with you than with Asra, he didn't seem like he **had** an issue with you." Julian _mumbles_ while he rubs the back of his neck. The **more** he kept murmuring, **the more vigorous** his rubs behind his neck were. I clear my throat, Julian _breaks_ his **agitated acts** and peers at me with curiosity.

" **Before** I answer your question, can you tell me where did you come up _with this idea_?" I turn my body to **face** him and throw a curious gaze at him. Julian isn't as _nervous_ as earlier. It seems my willingness **made** him _less uncomfortable_.

"I **saw** you after we arrived back from the Arcana realm. You were looking at Asra often. As if you _were seeking_ something that has been eating you on the **inside**. Asra recognized, that you were staring and approached you to ask if **_something_** was wrong. **But** you denied and kept a distance from him throughout the rest of the evening. Before when I went out to find you in the garden, I could see from afar, you were in **deep** thoughts so…" Julian gazes with his _gentle_ eyes and smiles at me. I rub my thumb on his hand, which it's **holding** mine.

"I **want** to be there for you, to comfort you from _whatever_ bothers you. **You** have been there for me before, so I also wish to show you, that you **can** trust me and **I will** listen to anything you need. I-I **love** you, Y/N."

 _Oddly_ enough, Julian's cheeks are **not** as gleaming as they are whenever he is _vulnerable_. His gaze is so **determined** and loving, it makes my heart **throb** and I **can't stop** observing his eyes. Julian's quite attentive to my needs and desires; I feel **happy** he noticed something was bothering me. Before when I started to know Julian, and we had **our** _so-called_ **"break-up"** , Asra said that even if Julian **moved on** from his martyr complex, he **would** depend on me even more and it would take **a toll on me**. But I believed in Julian **no matter what** , and I'm **glad** he proved me likewise.

I reach my hand and **grasp** his cheek. My thumb rubs _softly_ on his loving cheek and then I let out a _brief_ sigh.

"I love you, **too**. And I **want** to be honest with you, too. **_Ah_** , you are **so** thoughtful and kind, **_thank you_**." My grip switches from his cheek in his chin; my lips **come** and give him a _light_ kiss in his _pleasant_ cheek. After my grip **loosened** , I witness Julian looking downcast with a sheepish smile.

" ** _Now_** , where do I start? Hmm?" I'm stroking my chin with the hand that was a few seconds under Julian's **grasp**. With the conclusion I **came up** to adjust my body, I could **find more** distance between me and Julian. I **_need_** to concentrate on what I have to say.

Would you look at **that**? Some _tiny_ golden ducklings are walking in line behind their **_mommy duck_**. Then they swam on the pond. The tropical water lilies **surrounded** the pond. They create **more** colors on it **even** under the **dark** veil of the night.

 _Let's_ **not** lose focus **now**! I know life is **full** of slight moments that make you appreciate the beauty of life and the fact we **are** alive. **Now** I'm getting **_philosophical_** great…

"It's a **_beautiful_** night, isn't it?" It seems Julian caught up with my train of thoughts since he has that mischievous expression.

I **nod** at him with a smirk and then I brush **away** a few strands. My fingers run through my hair, it helps to **_calm_** my nerves _a bit_.

" _Uhh_ , you see, after Asra revived me, I **acted** like an infant. I couldn't **walk** , _speak_ , do **_magic_** and other things that every grown person does. Asra **taught** me everything. He **never** complained, and he kept trying to motivate me and _believe_ in myself." I _utter_ a deep sigh. Talking about those times is **always** hard because I was **so** scared and _helpless_. The **only** person I depended **on** was Asra, and with him by my side, it helped me improve faster. But I can imagine how much of a **heavy burden** he carried on his own those three years.

While being in **heavy** thoughts, a hand **pats** my back. I tilt my neck in Julian's direction, and he gives me a _soft_ smile. His gaze looked so caring. That made my heart **_flutter_** , and it led my courage to **keep going**.

"Thanks to him, I stood **on my** **own** feet again and **faced everything** that happened lately. I-I have thanked him many times for reviving and helping me, _b-but_ …" I stare down at the pond; tears welled up in my **eyes**. I don't want to cry, not right **now**.

My brows furrow as I relive a **_faint_** , muddled flashback. I **found** myself in some man's arms. His entire body was _trembling_ , but he held me **tight** like he was **so** scared I would disappear right there. I **couldn't move** my limbs. Everything around the environment was **almost** imperceptible for my senses. **All** I felt were tears pouring down my pale face and neck. They were warm, but **so** _somber_. The tears were streaming from the man's sobs **above** me. He seemed miserable and **such a mess**. He spoke to me through his **_convulsive_** **gasps.** But my ears didn't pick up **anything** , **_only_** _muffled sounds_ , like being underwater. At the time I kept thinking **who was** this person seizing me with **such** affection, but **also** giving such an **anguished sob**. Those genuine emotions, somehow they reached **my will.** And that drove me to **grasp** with my _shaky_ arm his cheek and I wiped some of those tears. As my **hand** brushes his cheek, his body **tensed**. A shudder went through his **whole** body and his face grew rigid with **shock**. Suddenly, I could distinguish the **facial** features of the man in front of me. His disheveled **_curly_** white hair, his _puffy_ purple eyes that showed such a horrified look. He was the Asra that I know **now** , but then I **didn't** recognize him. I remembered **nothing** from my past, and **even now** I don't. His tears continued to flow, but he held my palm in his cheek and showed me a **_wavering_** smile. After that, I fainted and I don't know when I woke up **again**. I might have woken up a few days later... weeks…

Asra told me he tried _a few_ times to tell me about the past and my death, but **all of those** endeavors met their **_unfortunate_** end. He **had** to erase those memories, or I would get stuck in **those** catatonic states. I couldn't **handle** the truth…

I took a **deep** breath. **In** and _out_. I **needed** to calm down. There's _nothing_ I can do about the past. Important for now are the **actions** I do now, so I'm **more** capable to **walk away** from the past that drags me.

"… Julian I-I… I **need** to thank him in the proper way. For **_everything_** , he has done. I can't do that if I don't know why he went so **far** for me. He deserves **that** , at least. He **must** be regretful about something that happened between **us**. I-I wish I knew what **it was** , so we both can move on, **especially** him. I **care** about Asra, he's **my** closest friend. He was the **only** **one**... so **of course** I want to-" A heavy groan escapes from my throat and I held my head, **overwhelmed** by emotions.

Julian's hand **_shifted_** from my back on my neck. _Rubs_ and **kneads** , **presses** and _strokes_. Julian was massaging my tense **parts** , he was comforting me. I tilt my head to meet him and then his eyes **_encountered_** my **stare** , a reassuring smile spread on his **face**. **All** I read from his expression was that he understands, and he is here **for me**. It was enough for me to be more at **_ease_**.

"… I-I…" an overwhelming feeling causes my voice to tremble. Julian's strokes became slower, but **firmer**.

"What **should** I do? Should I just approach him and **ask**? What **if** he isn't sincere with me? Or am I **able** to deal with whatever he will say?" while I mumbled, Julian grasps my shoulders and I shift my body in his direction. I must seem distraught since he is gazing at me in hastily.

"Y/N, you are worrying **too much** and **I'm** saying that, _so_ you can take a good guess that you are being **too** anxious. I'm sure if you ask him, he **will** be honest with you. I **_highly_** doubt he doesn't remember whatever transpired with you and him. _So_ , go for **it**! You believe it will make **both of you** feel better, so **_why_** not give it a **shot**?" When his speech ends, Julian fondles a strand of my hair and kisses it while he gazes at me.

He's right, but also he _mentioned_ something that made another question **_pop up_** in my mind. I follow my curiosity.

"Julian, why are you so **_certain_** Asra remembers about what happened between him and me **back** then?" His skin prickled, and I witness **his jaw drop** from my observant remark.

And he gets **even** more nervous, ruffling his auburn hair while _avoiding_ eye contact with me. I lean closer, so he **can't** escape from my eyes, which took him by surprise. But he acknowledged he couldn't avoid my **_piercing_** gaze.

"I-I mean, it is **more** like a prediction than anything. As you said, Asra has done a lot for you. **Hell** , he even revived you! That's **_definitely_** something that we don't hear on a day-to-day basis. He cares for you **a lot** , _maybe_ he even-" his speech comes to a sudden halt and again he averts my sight.

This is **becoming** annoying. I grasp both sides of his pale face and angle him to find my view.

"He even **what**?" I was _louder_ than I expected. I'm getting impatient and I **demand** his say.

 **No** , I'm being rude, he's helping me and here I am, yelling and "demanding" answers.

"I'm sor-"

Julian puts his index finger on my lips to hush me. His finger _lingers_ on my lower lip. And then he began **circling** it. A rosy blush _emerged_ in my cheeks. Uncertainty reaches me as I can't tell if I'm **irritated** that he is acting like this now or if I enjoy **this**. From the shiver that goes through my body, I grit my teeth and I throw him a **fixed** gaze. I see his eyes drift from my lips to meet my gaze and he makes a **cocky** smirk. Then he inclines his head; his lips keep getting _closer_ to mine. He's **_actually_** doing this right **now**! I should react, **push** him and insist to show me his answer. But his charm has already enthralled me, and I _barely_ endured my desire to follow his movements. It is **hard** standing firm when my cheeks keep growing **_warmer_** and my heart kept palpitating even **more**. Our noses were **_only_** a few inches apart. I **shut** my eyes since I **couldn't** deny my feelings anymore and wait for his embrace…

That never came... instead, I felt a _tingle_ on my forehead. He **flicked** me. On instinct, I **open** my eyelids and all I receive is his **_goofy_** grin from ear to ear. He laughs while leaning his head back.

"Sorry, my love haha! I didn't want to **miss** this opportunity and besides..." he approaches and his gaze laid on me, a **_hint_** of mischief gleams in his eyes.

" **This is** my vengeance for the teasing you did earlier, Y/N. _Ahh_ , you reap what you sow, **love**."

I place my hand where I **keep** sensing the **_tingling_** sensation and I **_pinned_** him a **fierce** glare.

"Julian, this is **no** time to act like children! W-We have to be serious-" again, he interrupts with his finger pointing in front of me. He _waves_ it from side to side.

" _Tsk tsk_ , **Y/N**! We **_know_** that this isn't how children converse with one another, it would be **too** _shame_ -"

I **hold** his _rowdy_ mouth. His **_muffled_** giggle is what my hands sense shortly after I **grasp** him.

"This **_isn't_** funny, Julian!" A frown forms while I **glare** at him. After my remark, he **grabs** my wrists with a _swift_ motion and kisses the insides of my wrists.

"I **know** , I _know_ … I'm sorry, but I **can't** help myself. You **will always** distract me **_no_** matter how desperate the case we are **in** is, Y/N."

My heart is thumping **so** loud that it sends shivers down my spine and my cheeks **are hotter** than ever.

I try to hide from his **gaze** with my arms the blushing mess I **had** turned into. **But** he reads my movements, so my hands under his grip **lay on** his legs. My eyes **wander** sideways from his earnest gaze. But I **need** to hear what he's avoiding to share, **so** I look back at him.

"He **_even_** what, Julian?" I await his **answer** with expectancy, Julian uttered a deep sigh.

His sight shifts downcast, looking at our **holding hands**.

" _Perhaps he even **loves** you_…"

 _Love me_? He **loves** me? Hmm… this is **one** of the motives that can drive someone to go **so far** and take drastic actions. People that are **_deeply in love_** can become quite selfless in dire situations. Though, if this is **what** Asra might feel towards me, **it would** complicate things between us. We **both** would be in an uncomfortable position. If I tried to ask him about whatever happened between us in the past.

During my train of thought, I **had moved** in certain thinking positions without being aware of them. When my thinking process **ends** , I was stroking my chin with a slouched back. Julian was staring at me in silence, he **_seemed_** curious about whatever **was going on** in my mind.

I clear my throat before I speak, "Y-You **could** be right, Julian. **_If_** he has feelings for me, it would make sense why he went through **so much** for me. It makes the situation more awkward _though_ …" I **stroke** my neck dimple with my hand and have a _quick_ breath.

"I **_should_** talk to him, I **have to**. **_Even more_** , if he loves me. **If** I'm more direct, it might help him **move on** from the past. **_But_** what if, because I don't remember what went on in the past, it'll cause him to be more reluctant to open up? Then, things would become worse…"

" **Y/N**! I understand your worries, **_but_** besides everything, speak with him. _Like_ you mentioned before, you **want** to thank him in the **right way** for what he has done for you. The appropriate path is to **_reach him._** I'm sure that you are **the one** that will handle this ordeal better than anyone else. You are **smarter** and **stronger** than you think, Y/N."

Julian is staring at me with such determination. He **tightens** his grip on my hands, making me believe even more in what he said.

"I _see_ … Julian. You had **no** idea that Asra and I **_knew_** each other before?" Curiosity **killed** the cat, I'm **the cat**. Who knows, I'm good at getting **back** to life, I would probably find my way to come back **again**. Anyway, it seems Julian is _less_ uneasy than before. It looks like he's being **more** understanding of my interest.

Julian utters a sigh **_while_** ruffling his hair and **scratches** the back of his head.

" _Not_ when you were alive, you **never** mentioned his name to me. _Awhile_ after your death, Asra **got back** to Vesuvia. By the way, I **knew** Asra before I met you, before the plague. He worked a few times **under** Lucio, so I met him ages ago. Even then, Asra was **_so_** _impossible_ to deal with. He has always been _so_ enigmatic and _peculiar_ haha!" It seems nostalgia overtook him. A _crooked_ grin spread over his face.

Shortly after, Julian emits a brief **grunt,** and he pinches the _bridge_ of his nose.

"Anyway, when he **came back** to Vesuvia, I found out you _knew_ each other. We **never** talked about you. I **never** asked him how close the two of you were, since back then I felt **guilty** that I didn't discover in time you were **sick**. Still, I remember **_well how_** Asra was then. We _worked_ to find a cure for the plague at the palace. Whenever he was there, he would daydream, **nap** _or just be_ **lazy** in general. I noticed _later_ that after he went home, he would do **magic stuff** until late at night, sometimes even until **dawn**."

"I-I didn't know what Asra was doing. **Every time** I inquired, he would give _vague_ answers or change the subject. At the time I **wanted** to think this had to do with plague and that he was **_seeking_** in his own way. **_But now_** I realize w-what he was doing…"

Julian made a _swift_ swallow, rubbed his **_sweaty_** palms in his white shirt, and then he looks at me in the eye.

"A-Asra, he was trying to find the right ritual to **revive** you. So, I _guess_ for someone like him to act **so** **_erratic_** during those times... He was **desperate** , like how I was, but of course, he was desperate to _bring_ you **back**."

Julian's description of Asra's behavior **sounds** authentic with the Asra I met after he revived me. He seemed **despondent** , _shaken,_ but also **_pleased_** he had achieved what he had sacrificed **so much** for. That memory is _so_ bittersweet **now** …

"Thank you, Julian. _Uhh_ , now I know why you believe that I **should** talk to him. I know it wasn't easy, so I'm **glad** you did this for me."

A warm smile appears on my face, Julian utters a sigh and his body loosened from **the tension**. I tucked behind my ear _a strand_ of my hair and then I **clench** my fists.

"I-I have decided, I **will** talk to him, so I can end that chapter of my life, **_finally_**!"

The clouds of uneasiness dispersed, **one** by **one** , from Julian's _carefully_ thought advice and his belief **in** me. My confidence was _brimming_ **after** letting **_off_** my steam. These moments make me appreciate **the most** ; that I have people that will listen to me about my worries and tell me if I'm **_going off_** the wrong **path**. The past and whatever happened during those times _seem so_ trivial compared to **what** I have in the present. I'm sure that **_no matter what_** , I would never exchange what I have **now** for what the past hides from me under the **shadows**.

Julian chuckles, his laughter _echoes_ the delighted **state** of my mind.

" **That's** my love! Your tenacity is radiating like **one** of those shining stars up **_there_** ~!" He points with his finger **up** in the sky.

As his finger relaxes, he looks at me with his **broad** grin. "You **only** needed my help to **add** fuel to **_that fire_** of yours haha!"

After that _ridiculous_ remark, we **share** each other's joyful **auras**. When we calmed down, I was considering when I **should** confront Asra about my concerns. **The best** choice to approach him is tomorrow after we **both** get some decent rest tonight. _All of us_ that fought the **damn** Devil need an enjoyable sleep. _Or_ I could talk to him **now**? Right after that thought, my eagerness **raised** up and with a steady growth reached **the top**. I knew it wasn't _the most_ proper time to talk to Asra **now** , but the anticipation entangled **my** insides. With **each** passing of seconds, it became **_more_** difficult to stay put.

" _Sooo_ ~! Where _were_ we?" Realization kicked me from Julian's **sudden** closeness. Because I was in deep thoughts, I **_didn't_** realize how **much** Julian closed the space between us. I could sense his warm breath coming from his _slightly_ open mouth. My elbows were **_already under_** his hands' grasp. He moves from my joints, **holds** my palms and then intertwined **our** fingers together. **Now** that I was aware of my position, a swallow goes _down_ my throat and my sight turned towards his. As I meet his eyes, Julian wiggles **one** of his eyebrows as a sign of invitation. _Hmm_ …

I unleash myself from this entwine and stood **up** from the bench, "I will talk to Asra, _right_ **now**!" As I say that I **start** to head back to the palace.

" ** _Huh_**? _Er_ , w-what?!" Julian's expressions shifted in **_those_** _few_ actions of mine from confused to shocked. And then his mind **absorbed** what transpired in front of him.

" **Wait** , w-wait Y/N!" As his hurried exclamation **hit** my ears, my pace **came** to a halt.

My head bends to face him. It was _a little_ hard to stand in **one place** from the surge of anticipation I was experiencing. But for him, it is **always** worth it to endure as **much** as I can.

"Are you **_sure_** about talking to him tonight? _Maybe_ it is best to—-"

"I **_know_** it would be better to approach him tomorrow, but I feel like doing that right **now**. After I vent out to you, I **want** to talk to him as soon as I can, so I won't concern myself with things I **don't** remember _anymore_." I spin my entire body towards his direction.

"Thanks to you, I'm **ready** to deal with that now." I tilt my head sideways and offer him an _adoring_ gaze. My hands **land** on my hips while I give him an **_enormous_** smile. It seems my posture is emanating my hope and faith since a _lopsided_ grin spreads on Julian's face.

"Well then, I _guess_ there's nothing that will **stop** you **now** , haha! You **don't** even need **_me_** to wish you luck because, with **that** attitude, you will do _just_ **fine**!" In the end, a chortle escapes from him.

He tilts his head, orienting it at my **stand** "What are _you_ waiting for then?"

His arm extended, and his hand **faced** downwards. Soon he wiggles his fingers "Move along… _Shoo shoo_ ~"

A smile from ear to ear appeared **on** me after his _little_ tease. When I took the first step to **go** , _something_ passed through my mind. I decided to **not** let that thought vanish without fulfilling its **own** purpose.

Again I swing my head sideways; I **couldn't** hide my Cheshire cat grin.

"Julian?"

He stares at me with his _narrow_ eyes, "After I'm done, we _can_ pick up where we left **off** hehe!"

As soon as I end my speech, his chin _trembles_ and his cheeks were glowing with a **beautiful** crimson.

A cackle burst **out** as a **_boast_** for following my **gut**. Before I take off, I give him a swift wink and **_blow_** him a _loving_ kiss. And I **ran** towards the palace. I hope Asra is **still** in the palace and I can resolve this tonight. I wonder **how many** mischiefs I and Julian will get **into** together _after_ I handle this ordeal. It has been **such** a while since I have been **_so_** happy with myself and the people I'm surrounded with. So _no matter_ what the future holds, with them I believe I **can** achieve anything.


End file.
